Episode 9: Shut your Memphis Depay hole

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Wherein Our Heroes elaborate on Lewandowski’s quint trick, Sir Alex Ferguson’s world beaters, Emmanuel Adebayor’s clubless woes, Brendan Rodgers’ lifeline (aka Daniel Sturridge), José Mourinho’s straight dope, James Milner’s Yorkshire puddings, Rudy Gestede’s head, Romelu Lukaku’s brace, Catalan tax evasion, Ligue 1 effigies, Memphis Depay’s golden grill, Morgan Schneiderlin’s ESL tips, and search engine optimization. Also, Cyle Larin is invited out for a rip and Adam and Jason do their best Harry ’Michael’ Kane impressions.

Music: “See You Through” by Bear Mountain

Episode 8: Out for a Rip

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Wherein Our Heroes get in touch with their Canuck roots, provide a polite round up of Canadian MLS action, and cover the Premier League like a good toque when yer out playin’ shinny. Also, Costa flattens Koscielny like a beaver tail, Winston Reid stands firm like a lodgepole pine, and Anthony Martial rocks Southampton like The Young Gaffers rock a flannel shirt.

Music: “See You Through” by Bear Mountain

Episode 7: Dimitri’s gonna make you Payet

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Wherein Our Heroes wax philosophical about goings on in the Barclays Premier League and Major League Soccer – Ivanovic is Terrible, Cesc looks Fabregassed and Michel scores an olimpico. Also, Italians get their green cards, the world’s first Permhawk is duly celebrated, and we witness a magnificent Double Outro.

Music: “See You Through” by Bear Mountain

Episode 6: Our Harry Shipp’s come in

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Wherein Our Heroes read fan mail, provide a geometry lesson, and promise to discuss things later (but in true Gaffers fashion, don’t). Also, Robert Huth and Saido Berahino are declared co-recipients in a weekly segment.

Music: “See You Through” by Bear Mountain

Episode 5: It’s Mad. No…it’s Visionary!

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Wherein Our Heroes meditate on Drogba’s toe, the Group of Death, and laud Dominic Oduro’s coif. Also, “United Passions” gets the full Young Gaffers treatment and, in a surprise twist, an Australian businessman takes home the Joey Barton Award for being very un-Kewell.

Music: “See You Through” by Bear Mountain